20040501
It's all a matter of opinion my ass- and wes is sure as hell wrong.
He talks about being grownup and talking about anything- yet he singles out sex, and criticizes me for my way of getting a point across.
I don't know where I stand on sex- exactly. I consider it something that two people do when they are in love- and I have not had sex yet (allthough I have wanted to, with one person) and I am not going to until I am in love again. perhaps after I have had sex that first time, it will become increasingly easy to have sex with anyone, I know not. but what I do know, is that Iave desired to have sex- but I have never desired (not strongly or truly) to have sex with someone I didn't love.
You, as a reader, whoever you may be, might find this hard to believe. I will admit- occasionally I have just wanted to have sex out of feelings and lust- perhaps with anyone that was attractive and available. but I have NEVER wanted it enough to actually do it. I can always fantasize, for chrissakes.
It's not because of religion, either. I'm not a strong christian, muslim, hindu, doaist (allthough I suppose that's a practice)- I'm not any of those things. I'm just someone that only wants to have sex for love.
Perhaps because I see it as some extra special thing, and don't want to wake up in the morning having realized that I have commited some ridiculously close act with someone I don't really care about. I know not. It's simply my choice.
perhaps wes needs to rationalize his own insecurities- perhaps not. however, what I DO know is that Wes has a slightly warped meaning of "mature." Perhaps he means physical maturity- but he doesn't mean mental maturity. Mental maturity is a stage in which we have outgrown our needs to do childish things- perhaps that means retarded jokes, perhaps that means playing pranks on others, perhaps it means not throwing emotional tantrums, perhaps it means taking responsiblity, I know not EXACTLY what it means. however, I do know that I would not classify Wes as mature.
Not being able to control your intake of substances (alcohol) is not something I would define as "mature." even though alcohol cannot be purchased by minors, he IS one and has no control over it. I wouldn't define an alcoholic as totally mature, either.
Sticking your head out the window and screaming "hey there" or catcalling isn't exactly mature, either. it lets everyone around you know that you aren't grownup.
Perhaps Wes sees catcalling as a "I don't care what everyone else thinks about me, I just wanna have fun" kind of attitude- and I don't believe that this ATTITUDE is mature. maturity is taking care of your responsibilities- maturity is behaving like an adult- and in this society- those behaviors are NOT considered mature.
yes- part of being mature is the ability to discuss almost anything- but in a MATURE fashion. not like little children snickering behind a bush or vulgar teenagers in some dark attic sneering and degrading some ficticious woman.
By my own standards, I am not mature, either. but wes has many other qualities I have not pegged here that I would not qualify as mature.
I don't take complete responsibility for my inaction. this is something that I am not totally mature about.... but I believe that recognizing one's own mistakes is the first step to maturity.
He talks about being grownup and talking about anything- yet he singles out sex, and criticizes me for my way of getting a point across.
I don't know where I stand on sex- exactly. I consider it something that two people do when they are in love- and I have not had sex yet (allthough I have wanted to, with one person) and I am not going to until I am in love again. perhaps after I have had sex that first time, it will become increasingly easy to have sex with anyone, I know not. but what I do know, is that Iave desired to have sex- but I have never desired (not strongly or truly) to have sex with someone I didn't love.
You, as a reader, whoever you may be, might find this hard to believe. I will admit- occasionally I have just wanted to have sex out of feelings and lust- perhaps with anyone that was attractive and available. but I have NEVER wanted it enough to actually do it. I can always fantasize, for chrissakes.
It's not because of religion, either. I'm not a strong christian, muslim, hindu, doaist (allthough I suppose that's a practice)- I'm not any of those things. I'm just someone that only wants to have sex for love.
Perhaps because I see it as some extra special thing, and don't want to wake up in the morning having realized that I have commited some ridiculously close act with someone I don't really care about. I know not. It's simply my choice.
perhaps wes needs to rationalize his own insecurities- perhaps not. however, what I DO know is that Wes has a slightly warped meaning of "mature." Perhaps he means physical maturity- but he doesn't mean mental maturity. Mental maturity is a stage in which we have outgrown our needs to do childish things- perhaps that means retarded jokes, perhaps that means playing pranks on others, perhaps it means not throwing emotional tantrums, perhaps it means taking responsiblity, I know not EXACTLY what it means. however, I do know that I would not classify Wes as mature.
Not being able to control your intake of substances (alcohol) is not something I would define as "mature." even though alcohol cannot be purchased by minors, he IS one and has no control over it. I wouldn't define an alcoholic as totally mature, either.
Sticking your head out the window and screaming "hey there" or catcalling isn't exactly mature, either. it lets everyone around you know that you aren't grownup.
Perhaps Wes sees catcalling as a "I don't care what everyone else thinks about me, I just wanna have fun" kind of attitude- and I don't believe that this ATTITUDE is mature. maturity is taking care of your responsibilities- maturity is behaving like an adult- and in this society- those behaviors are NOT considered mature.
yes- part of being mature is the ability to discuss almost anything- but in a MATURE fashion. not like little children snickering behind a bush or vulgar teenagers in some dark attic sneering and degrading some ficticious woman.
By my own standards, I am not mature, either. but wes has many other qualities I have not pegged here that I would not qualify as mature.
I don't take complete responsibility for my inaction. this is something that I am not totally mature about.... but I believe that recognizing one's own mistakes is the first step to maturity.
